Our friends at Metal Injection found this video featuring a young Stone Philips, where he warns us about those "heavy metal rockers." Our Monday morning just got better.

Here's some of our favorite parts:
01:31 What's metal about? Tell it like it is, kid!
03:07 Picket signs! Stop rock! Record burnings? Not very green.
03:19 Tipper!
03:38 Bruce!
04:16 Hormones popping?
04:31 Nice sweater, Stone.
05:15 "This is it? This is the hot stuff?"
06:23 "They spend their afternoons at the record store."
06:42 Preps dress "like they're in freaking Hawaii or something."
07:66 "There might not ever be a future 'cuz they're still making all these weapons."
10:14 This kid Jay Kalfin at five is more metal than you were when you were a kid.
11:14 Moshing "at times looks like a contact sport."
12:22 Tony Kingslow wants an earring!
13:51 Killer Iron Maiden light show.
14:19 Bruce Dickinson telling Stone Philips what is up!