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Machine Head’s Robb Flynn Takes Avenged Sevenfold to Task in New Online Diary

Robb Flynn M Shadows
Frazer Harrison / Theo Wargo, Getty Images

Machine Head frontman Robb Flynn is not a huge fan of Avenged Sevenfold‘s new album ‘Hail to the King,’ which debuted at No. 1 on the Billboard Top 200 chart last week, their second time landing in the top slot. Flynn, known for being an opinionated chap, posted his latest online diary/blog, congratulating the OC band on its “covers album” doing so well. Ouch!

Below is the entirety of the post, and his Top 10 jokes about the record, David Letterman-style. The singer and guitarist claims to like the band and to be happy for them, but that doesn’t make him above calling it as he sees it. Is a beef a’brewing? Could be. Or they could be bros who won’t be offended by this dig. Well, 10 digs, actually.

It’s pretty humorous, so maybe this doesn’t spell a battle of the bands? We can’t tell if A7X will dig this or be steaming out their ears over it. Read the entire post and tell us what you think in the comments. Is this a diss or a joke?

Congratulations to Avenged Sevenfold on their latest “covers album” coming in at #1, who knew that re-recording Metallica, Guns N Roses, and Megadeth songs could be such a worldwide hit!!?? Ba-dap Psssssss!!

I’m on fire!!

In case you’ve been living under a rock, Avenged came in at #1 in multiple countries throughout the world. I’m happy for them. Good band. And while I like the new record, and really dug the last record “Nightmare,” hopefully we’re all coming down from our post-orgasmic #1-album-bliss, because it’s time to call a spade a spade!! It’s time to poke a little fun at A7X, cause there’s some blatant jackery goin’ on there wiggas!!

So here are my top 10 jokes about the new Avenged Sevenfold record:

10) Avenged Sevenfold – “Now with even MORE Metallica”

9) Avenged Sevenfold to change name to “Sad But Two”

Number of “spurting penises” drawn on Avenged logos suddenly skyrockets

7) Eyeliner sales skyrocket as thousands of heartbroken goth girls realize “Hail To The King” is actually “that ugly AC/DC bands song ‘Thunderstruck’”

6) After hearing “Heretic”, Dave Mustaine flips out, blames Obama, Metallica and UFO’s for the A7X stealing “Symphony Of Destruction”.

5) After seeing how much success the band Bush had stealing other band names for song titles, A7X decided to steal “In Flames” for latest chorus. Future chorus lyrics include “Tr-vi-um” and “Kill-switch En-gage”

4) Upon hearing latest album, Lars Ulrich goes all gangsta, breaks bottle of Dom Perignon on M. Shadows head, while his 11ft girlfriend put Shadows in headlock, as he screams in Shadows face, “You’re gonna rip off St. Anger next right, HUH? You’re gonna rip off St Anger NEXT RIGHT? HUH, HUH, HUH!!”

3) “Black album” sales skyrocket as fans realise where new songs came from.

2) After hearing Avenged’s Guns N Roses cover “Doing Time”, Axl actually calls Slash, says, “Dude, What The F–k?!”

1) And the #1 joke about the new Avenged Sevenfold album: Avenged Sevenfold release statement that they’re NOT ripping off Metallica, announce side project with Lou Reed.

BOOM!

Next: See Previous Robb Flynn Rant About Spotify

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